Strange how life can be able to kick you in the ass whenever you don´t expect it. There seems to be an endless source of possibilties what can go wrong in a big way. I must confess that I am getting really tired. You jump one hurdle and the next is waiting. I am not tending to ask why. Why me, why our family. It is so futile and why not me? Is there somebody who should get this kicks? If life is a lesson, believe me, I don´t remember choosing this course. But I see no other way but forward, take a day off as well as you can and face the next one.
Sometimes it doesn´t work this way and I have been there too. When the brain just stops working right: when the ground beneath literally starts to move, when you don´t remember what you are doing in this place you find yourself in, when the car seems to drive by it´s own to places you never knew you where going to, when the body refuses to take the food you offer, when the colours fade out of your life. I don´t think I will go there again. I have learned too much since than. But I am so exhausted today that I find it difficult to go up the stairs in our house. And on top off all there is a sceduled meeting tomorrow morning about the lack of supervisors in Marinós home. That scares me. I have no energy at the moment and no opportunity either to take him more often home than usually, that means twice a week for dinner and the evening. So, now I will mix me some nice energy drink and watch “lost” on TV and knit. And then I read some exciting thriller until my sleeping pills will work. See you.